The Little Elf
Round 1
Alithilien Inathirielle
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Results
Pros:
great setup for the shot, I love the little house and all in the background. I like the simple framing around the image too.
I like seeing part of the house in the background as well as trees.
Cons:
I'm not sure what your little boy is looking at, and he don't seem very enthusiastic. I wish he was either looking at the camera or involved with an activity to turn his attention to.
The border is a bit wobbly around the edges like it was drawn freehand.
Tips on How to Improve:
I'd love it if your elf was more animated so we could get more of a feel for the kind of elf you have.
Phoebe's Notes
I was a little embarassed when I read the judgings for this round. The border was actually hand drawn! This was the first entry to a competition I'd ever entered. Can you tell I've improved?
Round 2
Alithilien Inathirielle
I knew the instant my dad told me we were going to the human park that I was doomed. I had been planning on spending the rest of my life locked in my room after I found out we were moving to Veronaville.
Sure enough, all the kids were jerks. They talked about me behind my back and thought I couldn't tell! Idiots. I was about to consider sneaking back to the new house until someone tapped me on the shoulder.
"They're nicer once you get to know them."
This girl said her name was Bottom Summerdream, and she was an elf, too! The people in Veronaville had been unfriendly at first, but now they liked her. I couldn't help but think that maybe they'd like me, too! We talked and played for hours.
Too soon, it was dark and dad said I had to go home.
"Bye, Bottom! I'll see you soon, I promise!"
Wow. I hope I see her again. Maybe she'll be in my class at Othello Elementary...
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Results
The Scene: 4.22
The Pose: 4.05
The Photography: 4.27
The Story: 4.66
The Instructions: 4.33
Total: 17.31
Comments:
"I liked the very different take this entry took. I also liked his picture being in the speech bubble in the background."
"Story was very cute and original. I had completely forgotten about Bottom Smmerdream!"
"Your 2nd image is one of my favorites out of all of the entries. Perhaps that's just because I can associate with the charcter/story but I still like it a lot. In your first image the thought bubbles a rather distracting. And not to nit pick, but I felt like his arms were at a funny angle in your first shot. But everything else; the bushes in the 2nd image, the entire scene and the cute wave in the thrid image, and his dejected look in the first image a just great. Looking forward to your next entry."
Phoebe's Notes
I like this entry, but looking back, I'm immensely glad I turned up the picture size on my computer. It really makes all the difference, doesn't it?
Round 3
Alithilien Inathirielle
Today would have been Beltane. If we had still lived with the other elves, that is. It was just like any other boring, stupid human day. At least, that's what I thought. Then father told Theniea, my older sister, and I, that we were going for a walk. It was almost night! I thought he'd gone crazy for sure.
We walked down the block as darkness fell and arrived at a house on the corner. As Theniea and I followed our father up the stairs, I looked around. It seemed to be a perfectly average house, what was so special about yellow stucco?
Dad knocked on the door. It slid open. The one thing I noticed immediately about the beaming man in the doorway was that his skin wasn't like the other citizens of Veronaville's skins - it was green! I could see his birthmarks inlaid in carefully above his eyes. He was an elf! Father grinned.
"Henrik!"
"Ideliann! I thought you weren't coming!"
"We couldn't miss Beltane, especially when we knew you'd all be here."
"Well, I'm glad you're here. This is Theniea, then?"
My sister inclined her head courteously.
"And Alithilien! The last time I saw you, you were just an elfling! Come in!"
It was a big house with a modern, flowing design. By piecing together bits of conversation, I gathered that Henrik lived here with his wife, Amithilia, and their roommates, Sarai and Jiaran. They were all elves. I'd thought that moving to Veronaville meant no more Beltane!
Jiaran, a gigantic elf with coal black eyes and dark skin directed me outdoors.
A fire was blazing, as per tradition. Around it stood several elves - Bottom among them! I ran over to her.
"Bottom! Where've you been? I haven't seen you all week!"
"I'm sooo sorry - we had to plan for this whole thing, you know, and then Mercutio and Puck got into an awful row - it's all ok, now, though. Marshmallow?"
It was a white, fluffy cylinder that positively reeked of artificial humanity.
"You put it on a stick," Bottom explained.
The marsh-melon was a lot better burned to a crisp. Bottom and I danced and played all night long.
Finally, after playing and talking with the other elves for hours on end, we walked home. I stumbled, tired, into bed and fell immediately asleep. I was never going to forget this year's Beltane!
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Results
The Scene: 3.88
The Pose: 3.88
The Photography: 3.94
The Story: 4.5
The Instructions: 4.5
Total: 20.7
Comments:
"I really liked your story, especially the part about marshmallows! Keep up the good work."
"Could have had closer pictures."
"I thought I should add that one judge wanted to give you a 5.5 on your story!"
Phoebe's Notes
I had to think a lot to come up with an idea for this round. Really, the solution was obvious. Alithilien would be moping around thinking there was no chance he'd get to celebrate Beltane and then he learned that he and the Summerdreams weren't the only elves in Veronaville! Still, the borders are crummy. I'm glad I figured out how to work them at long last.
Round 4
Alithilien Inathirielle
Today got off to a bad start. I forgot to read a chapter of Hamlet, the book we're discussing in school, and at recess, those two Monty boys, Mercutio and Romeo, pushed me off my swing and told me that elves belonged far away in the woods and I should leave. What jerks! When I came home, I was still busy stewing on the unfairness of it all when I heard crying from my sister's room. I ran upstairs.
"Theneia, what's the matter?" I've never known my sister to cry before.
"Romeo Monty is the matter," she sniffed through sobs. I handed her a hankerchief.
"Thanks." She wiped her eyes. "He's awful. He told me my leaves were ugly and I didn't belong here and a lot of other mean things..."
She dissolved into tears again.
I patted her on the back, burning with anger. I wasn't going to let him pick on my sister like that!
If there's anyone who's an expert on pranking, it's Bottom. She came over the same afternoon and I told her all the mean things that the Monty boys had done. Of course, she immediately had an idea.
A minute later, we were on the phone and Bottom was dialing the Monty's number. Isabella Monty answered.
"Monty house."
"Hiii, this is Juliet... Can I like, talk to Romeo pleeease?"
"Juliet, eh? Wait until Patrizio hears about this..."
I had lapsed into silent laughter at the high-pitched voice Bottom had used to imitate Juliet. She shoved the phone into my hands and I quickly pulled it to my ear, clearing my throat.
"Heya, babe - Romeo speaking!"
Yeah, that was him all right.
"Young man, do you know who I am?" I barked.
"Juliet?" said Romeo uncertainly.
"I'm Consort Capp, and I have recently been informed that you have been... canoodling with my granddaughter!"
"No such thing has happened, sir," stuttered Romeo.
Behind me, Bottom snorted. I contained a laugh.
"Don't lie to me, boy! Now, unless you want another severe reprimanding, You should straighten up! Understood?"
"Yessir!"
"I should certainly hope so! Good-bye!"
I slammed down the phone before Bottom and I fell into fits of laughter. Those Monty boys sure won't be bothering us again!
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Results
PhoebethePreble
Alithilien Inathirielle
The Scene: 4.56
The Pose: 4.69
The Photography: 4.31
The Story: 5
The Instructions: 5
Total: 23.56
Comments:
"This was one of my favorite stories by far. I love the creativity that went into this entry. Your scene building and photography have improved a lot since the beginning of this competition and you are also starting to shake Alithilien up and get him into some character revealing poses. Great work, keep it up!"
"Great plot ideas! I like. It's awesome that he defends his sister like that. Your poses were very creative and energetic. Just keep an eye on balance and and centering your subjects in the image. Another great entry! Looking forward to the next."
Phoebe's Notes
I'm very proud of this entry. I think that the artistry - that is to say, the photography and bordering and such - finally lived up to the writing, which had been my strong point up until now. I can't wait for the next round!
Current Status: Eliminated
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